Month: April 2019

Emotion

Flow

April 28, 2019 by 0 Comments

 

I can match you. Without even trying. It’s pure instinct for an empath. My emotions will rise up to meet and mix with yours. It’s crazy scary but exciting for a young empath. As you get older, you can learn to recognize the green lights and the red flags and where each encounter is likely headed.  We can choose to lean in or get away. Because when your emotions become ours, it changes us. Simpatico cool and good. OR simpatico creepy and scary. That’s why we need to be careful who we spend time with. If your emotions bleed into us, does it make us feel energized or exhausted? Depends on the emotion.

People like to be around empaths because we are good listeners. We are intense listeners. We are in the moment with you. We will meet you where you are. We become linked in. But do we want to link into the emotion you are serving up?

See the attached image. Emotional flow. Emotions can flow or be static. When I feel wary of the inner emotions coming my way from someone in close proximity to me, I try to picture their inside vibrations. If there is flow – like flowing lines – it’s okay. Emotions are flowing normally. If there are a lot of jagged and static lines, I disengage as quickly as possible because the chaotic feelings are overwhelming. I can’t quiet their emotions, and I have learned that it does an empath great harm to absorb toxic emotions for someone else’s relief.

So what are some examples of great flow moments and big static moments? Flow moments occur when combining with someone else’s emotions to achieve a higher (sometimes euphoric) level. They happen in romance, at concerts, during sporting events, while hiking. Worst static moments occur near someone out to do you emotional or physical harm. They happen in assault, browbeating, instability, shaming. Of course there are other examples of both, but you get the idea of the fun or the danger that empaths face when commingling emotions.

Tuning in to flow helps empaths know when to go for the ride and when to jump off the train.

Think about it cuz you know you’re gonna feel it.

 

Hope

Be Radiant

April 21, 2019 by 0 Comments

The most irresistible beauty is the radiant glow from a kind and gentle heart. ~ Richelle C. Goodrich

How to combat the darkness of the world? Be radiant. Seriously. Be radiant.

“Radiant” means sending out light; shining brightly. How can we shine our lights in a world that is increasingly consumed with bitterness and hatred? We can shine in spite of it. We can actively turn away from the tide of negativity and destruction, and we can actively turn toward optimism, growth, and rebirth.

From the ashes I rise. I am blooming into something radiant. ~ Melody Lee

We are born radiant. The light shines freely from a baby’s eyes. So what happens to us? People and experiences. Some people will try to douse your light on purpose; sometimes it’s by accident. Same with experiences. I’ve had people literally and knowingly try to snuff out my light, my spark, my hopes and dreams in the world. I’ve been told “You can’t be for real,” and “Now, you are damaged just like me.” It hurt, but I crawled toward help, and I never really believed the light squashers – because I learned that misery loves company and so I fled them.

They can change their minds but they can’t change me. I got a dream, I got a dream. ~ Jim Croce 

Keep moving. When our light is flickering and we need to stoke it, we can move toward things that fill us up. We can go out in the natural world and move through its beauty. We can move away from people and experiences that harm us and do not have our best interests at heart.  We can nurture our light with prayer, with kindness, with music, with travel, with love, with friendship, with breath, with whatever keeps us balanced in this unbalanced world.

Escape from the black cloud that surrounds you. Then you will see your own light as radiant as the moon. ~ Rumi

What is the point of radiance? To shine light and to send it out into the world. And that is how we can combat the discord that has the world bleeding. We can be in direct opposition to it by how we live, how we  heal, and how we interact with others. So be a lighthouse to yourself and others by keeping your own glow bright and strong. Defy the times. Be radiant.

 

 

Advocacy

Google “An Empath Is”

April 14, 2019 by 0 Comments

When I googled “an empath is” – this is what came up (in order):

  •  being an empath is killing me
  •  being an empath is exhausting 
  •  being an empath is hard
  •  when an empath is angry
  •  when an empath is hurt
  •  being an empath is ruining my life
  •  being an empath is draining
  •  being an empath is painful
  • when an empath gets depressed 

What? Is that it? Pain & Misery make the top ten on the Empath List? No, I don’t think so. No, I know not. I Googled “an empath is” on multiple days and even at different times of the day. Same list. Again and again. I’m not a computer tech at Google, so I don’t know how the drop down menu from a Google search is selected. I am an empath, and I do know that there are many articles and posts on the web addressing many empath characteristics, issues, and concerns. And they are not all negative.

There is a downside and an upside to almost everything. That includes being an empath. Feeling deeply can be really hard (pain, grief, etc.) Feeling deeply can be really wonderful (love, joy, etc.)  Feeling others feelings can be energizing (excitement, happiness, etc) or it can be exhausting (anger, sadness, etc.) The key is to see the big picture and to recognize yourself in it. In any given situation – Where is your balance? What is your role? How can you join in? How can you step away?

An empath is an empath. There is no changing who you are. But like everyone else, empaths are on a life journey where there are better and worse ways to navigate. Self- awareness and self-understanding will help guide your compass. Don’t let others define you or determine your happiness level. You decide how to finish the sentence.

 

 

Self-acceptance

Flow, Not Geyser

April 7, 2019 by 0 Comments

Geysers are beautiful, but you don’t want to feel like one.

Highly sensitive people feel a constant flow of emotions. It’s not something that we can control. It’s just how we experience life. Emotionally. It’s like having a bubbling natural spring inside you 24/7. One emotion surfaces and flows into another. New ones keep bubbling up to combine and collide with the previous ones. Its a watery kaliedescope of feelings. It’s a never-ending emotional well with every day and every moment. It’s a certain way to live that others may not understand.

Some people will tell you “Don’t overthink it.” What they really mean is “Don’t over feel it.” Well, sorry folks, we don’t know how to (not) do that. It’s like telling us not to breathe or not to breathe too much. It is the core to who we are, and we can’t imagine life any other way FOR US.

Instead, we need to learn to release our emotions freely as a natural spring does and not try to push them down. We don’t want our core lovely artesian well to become a not so lovely and potentially dangerous spewing geyser.

How to do that? First step is acknowledgment. This is how I perceive my world. Second step is  acceptance. I may be different, but I will stay true to who I am. Third step is learning to navigate in this world. I can learn how to channel my emotional energy without trying to squash it. Fourth step is protection. I will steer clear from those who try to drink my well dry.

Permission and access and faith are our biggest allies in self-acceptance. A highly sensitive person must give themselves permission:  permission to be who we are; permission to walk away; permission to feel every feeling without fear knowing that it will pass. A highly sensitive person must give themselves access: access to creative outlets; access to solitude; access to nature. A highly sensitive person must have faith: faith in a Higher power and the power of prayer; faith in ourselves; faith in humanity. Permission and access and faith will help to sustain us.

So flow like a spring, like a brook, like a river. Don’t dam yourself. Don’t geyser yourself. Feel what you feel when you feel it. It’s natural.