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When are you going to get over it? How many times have you heard that? Plenty? Enough? Empaths and highly sensitive people have to hear this phrase throughout their lives. It’s offensive to us because it is pushing your disappointment into our feelings at a time when we are already hurting.
Don’t expect us to be on your timetable. We don’t get over “it” easily. We don’t get over the break up, the assault, the death, (add your own) easily. We can’t, and you implying that we can is just adding criticism to pain.
Empaths and HSPs own their own feelings. Instead of trying to rush us out of them, maybe we can show you how to move through them. Moving through our pain to the other side of our healing is a journey all its own. And we are fearless in our emotions. That is our strength.
So the answer to the question is a resounding As Long As It Takes. You can’t rush hurting. You can’t rush healing. We grieve and feel long and hard….but then we rise. We stand and let the huge wave of emotion engulf us completely and sometimes knock us over. We know that we will live through it. Furthermore, we know that the wave will change us because the upside to emotional waves is that they leave compassion and understanding in their wake. To others, it may seem like it overwhelms us, but we know that it is passing through. We can handle it. And trying to stop the wave is dangerous for us. We need to own it, so we don’t get stuck in it. So your asking us to deny it is actually prolonging the pain.
So, when are you going to get over it? Not sure. Will time heal all wounds? Not sure. But I do know that the sun will come out again. And it will rise every morning. I will rise every morning. And that the right time to move on is when you move on.
