Month: April 2017

Be an escape artist. For a day. Or an hour. Or five minutes. To master the art of the escape, you need only three things: desire, vision, and opportunity. Escape artists are half methodical thinkers and half carpe diem joyriders. You can be both to take regular getaways from the ties that bind you.

Don’t get me wrong – I like my life. In fact, I love much about my life. But we humans carry a lot of stress and a lot of responsibility, and sometimes we need a break from the weight of it. A short break is a mini-vacation. Sometimes a mini mini-vacation. With a little planning and fortitude, your escape retreat time will work.

Empaths especially need escape time from others – even from those whom we love. This is no reflection on them or on us. We just need it. Why?

1. To think our own thoughts (without interruption).
2. To feel our own feelings (without intrusion of other’s feelings).
3. To come and go as we please (literally).

When my children were very young, I had two hours a week to myself due to an overlap in scheduling. Two hours off duty from my job and from parenting. Those two hours were precious, and I made the most of them. They were my mini-escape and my mini-vacation where I could just think and feel and go and be. Now that they are older, I recently attended an overnight conference. I made sure to plan “escape” time and enjoyed some brisk walks and a movie that took me far away from home.

I encourage you to plan an escape and get some time away from all others. You will return brighter and better for your time away. It’s a way to protect and grow your own little inner light so that when you return, you can shine it all the more brightly on others.

“I’m doing the best with what I got,” my sister often says. But she doesn’t stop there. She tries to make “what she got” a little bit better. You can too. One way to make “what you got” a little bit better is by doing yoga on a regular basis. It makes “what you got” stronger, more flexible and more stable. Yoga can help bring balance to your body and to your life, and it can literally change the way that you breathe.

You have one body. You were born with it, but it also carries your life history. Your body is a living combination of nature and nurture. Slightly crooked backs run in my family, only mine is more crooked than slightly. Yoga has taught me to accept my back but also to help it. I can’t make my spine straighter, but I can give it more flexibility and stability. And I can learn to breathe more calmly while I do it.

All forms of yoga focus on mind, body, and spirit, but yoga classes and teachers can vary widely. I encourage you to investigate before committing. Many classes teach Hatha yoga, and one form of Hatha yoga is Iyengar. I like this type of yoga because it is gentle. Iyengar yoga focuses on alignment, postures, and breath control. It is for all body types and all ages, and it lends itself as yoga therapy. Instructors will talk you through the breathing and the poses and give you blankets, pillows, or straps to assist you. Once you learn the basics, you can also practice yoga at home via DVD or on line videos.

Yoga also helps ground me – and grounding can be a challenge for empaths. By starting my day with yoga, I feel connected to the earth and to myself. My energy feels balanced, my breathing is low and steady, and my spine has gotten the encouragement it needs to meet the many demands of my day.

The closing words from Rodney Yee (accompanied by soft music and scenic ocean waves) on his AM Yoga DVD summarize why I get up early to start my day with yoga practice.  “Begin each and every day with openness and peace.” I wish the same for you. Namaste.

It might sound strange, but sometimes we forget to relax. Really. No kidding. We don’t schedule relaxing time into our days. (Have you ever written “relax” on your to do list? No, I didn’t think so.) And by the way, collapsing at the end of the day is not the same as relaxing.

Relaxing takes intention. We relax with focused intention. We choose to take time just for ourselves that will help replenish our depleted energy.

Empaths especially get depleted because we absorb other people’s energy, and our own emotions are often very intense. By the end of the day, our emotional cup is overflowing. Imagine a cup under a running faucet. You are the cup which can hold water easily. But the tap doesn’t get turned off and the emotional waterfall keeps on coming. Empaths can’t turn it off, but we can step out of the waterfall and dry off in the sun of relaxation.

So what does relaxation look like for you? Relaxing takes many forms, and you need to find which relaxing activities are enjoyable and restorative and doable for you. Here is some simple advice and a list from au.reachout.com/ways-to-relax:

“How to chill out

There are a lot of different things you can do to relax and chill out. A lot of forms of relaxation, like walking and sitting quietly, are really simple, easy to do, and don’t take much time. Others require more discipline and some training. Everyone will find some strategies for relaxation work better than others. The best thing to do is try out some of the suggestions below and make the ones that best fit your lifestyle a regular habit.

Some relaxation activities include:
Going for a walk
Taking some time out and really focussing on what’s happening around you
Listening to quiet and relaxing music, which impacts your heart rate
Going fishing
Playing your favourite sport
Taking a bath
Going to a movie or watching a DVD
Focussing your attention on a puzzle
Reading a book
Learning yoga or meditation
Practicing meditation”

When you take time to relax, your life will be better – for you and for those around you. Just do it.